Dead Kennedys - Dear Abby

Dear Abbey, Got a problem. I'm a decent, underpaid hardworking county coroner. It's important that my family eat meat at least 3 times a week. But we can't afford to with the prices the way they are. So I bring home choice cuts from my autopsy subjects. Just mix in the Tuna Helper...and TA-DA!! The Whole family thinks my new meals are delicious. They ask me what's my secret. Abby, I think they are getting suspicious. My smart ass 8 year old keeps asking, "Where's all the meat? The red dye #2 kind that's kept in the fridge" If they found out the truth I don't think they'll understand. Abby, what do I tell my family?